Life Gems with Tiffany Gonzalez: What's for you is for you

What's for you is for you

Self-care might be one of the simplest, and yet hardest things to do. Why? Well because we find it difficult to put the same effort in ourselves that we put into our loved ones, our careers, and our social life. At least, that has always been the case for me. I've spent countless hours worried about others and how they "seem" happy, and not enough hours worried about my own happiness. In today's day and age, social media has us even more wrapped up in everyone's business than in our own. We simply lose ourselves in the world around us. 

 

I've always felt behind in life; like I am not meant to be where I am currently stationed. It drove me to a point where I couldn't keep driving forward. I kept moving backwards, driving in circles; wondering why I felt so unhappy with my life, but don't get me wrong, I am blessed, and truly fortunate to have the things I have in my life: a family, shelter and food, encouraging friends, a job that's building itself into a promising career, and a strong educational background as I get closer to completing my Masters degree in Communication and Media. However, the problem is that when you compare yourself to others, you will never find peace within yourself and with where life has taken you, regardless of all of your accomplishments (small or big because they all
count). Your successes end up never feeling right enough, or big enough, or substantial enough because you aren't where you "believe" you should be...right there along with everyone else, or where you "assume" everyone else is: married, kids, high-paying job, house/apartment, the whole "American Dream". I'm laughing as I write this because I know it sounds ridiculous, but my brain thought otherwise, for so long, and I'm sure a good amount of you can relate. 

 

Let me tell you all something though, it's never too late to start loving yourself. It's never too late to start focusing on yourself instead of everyone else. It's never too late to say "enough is enough; I'm done hurting myself". We owe it to ourselves to make a change. For starters, let's be honest and real here, it isn't something that happens overnight. It takes patience and constantly checking yourself. It's about perspective, and training your mind to perceive things differently than what you're already used to. For me, it's all about working on how I view things and reminding myself that it's okay to not be stationed where everyone else seems to be. Happiness is not about what others want you to be or where you are, in comparison to others, it's about how you feel about yourself. That's why we must take care of ourselves. Practice positive affirmations, compliment yourself, look in the mirror and stare at that one feature you've never been too keen of, and start falling in love with it. Most importantly, don't be afraid to seek professional help if you need it. Sometimes we just need to talk to someone who has an unbiased point of view. As humans we are complex individuals, and our minds can be an abyss of doubt, fears and insecurities. There is no shame in asking someone to help you decipher those thoughts. Start worrying less about what society and others will think, and start worrying more about your mind, body and spirit. The rest will eventually start falling into place. 

 

After reading this, take a moment and close your eyes. Then, take a deep breath and say, "today, I will focus on me." Don't be scared to take time for yourself and to start loving who you are. 

 

Wishing you all a happy journey to self discovery and love!

-Tiffany